Heal for the sake of the people that you are going to be

Love yourself incredibly well, make your healing a top priority, follow through on your goals and do not worry about how others will react to that level of focused energy. Emotionally mature people will be attracted by your flourishing– Young Pueblo

Healing is not about going back to the person that you were before. It is about becoming someone completely new. It is not like fixing a fractured bone. It’s a complete rebirth and reinvention of self. It is learning to act from the place of our highest selves instead of our lowest impulses.

The path to healing is hard. This is the reason it is a forever thing. There is no point at which we are completed, no point at which we are insusceptible from being human. There is no point at which these urges will not creep upon us and no point at which we will not have to use our wisdom and grace to decide otherwise.

To think that your healing is something you do once and then never again is simply an ego trap. You are not returning to the person that you were. You are becoming someone who has never existed before, you are rebuilding an inheritance that will take a lifetime to have. Healing is weird. Some days you are okay, doing just fine. Other days it still hurts like it is fresh. It is a process with no conclusive time frame. You just have to keep going and to know that when it is all said and done, you are going to be okay.

Healing is going to change everything, but it has to start with you being willing to feel what you are afraid of feeling. Becoming the best version of yourself is your natural heritage. It is what you are born to do. Healing is simply letting go of the sickness that is the limiting beliefs and fears that are holding you back from doing exactly that.

Healing is not going back to exactly who you were before. This is because that person was not yet capable of seeing the storm before it hit and that person did not know how to protect themselves from it. You are not supposed to go back to being naive, less jaded or more unaware. You are not meant  to return you to your blissful mindlessness, a life in which you did not know about the contrasts, the pain, all of the good, the bad and the ugly that life can throw at you.

If your journey is taking longer than you thought it would, please know that you are unraveling and reconstructing decades of conditioning and that takes time. You are moving each piece of your life into place and that takes time. You are feeling things you did not dare to let yourself acknowledge and that takes time. You are slowly accepting truths you refuted for too long and that takes time. You are rewriting your own mind and that takes time. 

Sometimes our minds play tricks on our hearts. They piece together all of what is undone, unfinished and imperfect and begin to confuse it for who we really are. As human beings, we are wired to focus on the next thing, the next goal, the next job, the next threat, the next worry. It is how we have survived this long. But to truly actualize our potential, we have to start seeing the whole picture and the whole truth.

You are going to one day realize that that is not happiness. It was never about that next job, that next degree or that next relationship. It was never about following in the footprints of all those who came before you. It is about healing. You heal from your past traumas for the sake of the people that you are going to be. Broken people break others.You have what will feel like an entire lifetime to enjoy the people that you are becoming. You have so many years to arrive. 

What you get on the other side of healing is greater than that which you just have not yet experienced . What you go through when going through something painful is that you become more resilient, more self-sufficient, more empowered.You realize that nothing, absolutely nothing will save you and you must begin the work of saving yourself which is the entire purpose of your life. It is okay if you are still becoming who you want to be. The point is not how quickly you finish but that you had the courage to change at all. Even the smallest ripples turn into waves eventually. Be patient. Wait. Just a little bit longer, for them to show up on your shore.

If you could see yourself through the eyes of someone who loves you, you would never again doubt how important, how worthy and how needed you really are.It is okay if you are still healing into the person you want to be. It is okay if you do not arrive all at once. It is okay if your progress only happens in bits and pieces. It is okay if you are only sometimes the person you want to be. It is okay if your growth is something nobody can see but you. Allow yourself to be proud of yourself for all the progress you have made. Especially the progress that no one else can see.